|
|
Post by Dutchy on Jul 16, 2008 8:41:13 GMT
Ow.
She makes one go very weak at the knees does she not ;D
The Huntress of the Serengetti as saviour af small mammals and mental states of humanoids.
|
|
|
|
Post by Chuckles on Jul 16, 2008 9:36:36 GMT
 I was beginning to wonder what you had got out OM by the look on Lu's face ;D Isn't she an absolute dream of a cat, such character. Mmmm like her adopted owner I guess  She looks well at home in that pot OM obviously not bothered that her prospective toy had wondered off 
|
|
|
|
Post by Ruthie on Jul 16, 2008 18:15:23 GMT
Things are moving on. You've started calling her Lu instead of 'it'! I loooove the pic of her in the pot!!
|
|
|
|
Post by oldmoleskins on Oct 9, 2008 17:11:01 GMT
I think we must assume the training is going quite well... my training, by the cat Lulu, that is. a) reflecting upon the 'cat in pot' earlier, I have now created an indoor (well, as far as the porch is concerned, that's indoors enough) 'pot' and very smug it looks too, probably because of b)... b) I have been a bit concerned lately. Lu was looking decidely peeky and was off it's tuna while wowing in a particularly piteous fashion, day after day. Wowing a lot. Like incessantly. So, casting around for inexpensive remedies other than giving it away, I found myself straying down the pet aisle at Morrison's (good fish counter at Morrison's) and my eyes saw the tick/flea/worming products and I instantly diagnosed troublesome internal stuff - though I thought tapeworms made you hungry... Anyoldhow, I bought some 'instant effect' stuff to rub on the back of it's her neck (that's what I like, instant cure, though I'm not too sure about the price - nearly five quid - and how do you avoid absorbing it yourself while you apply it? P'raps you don't... maybe I've acquired instant worming for myself...) and then despite self regulation, I found myself idly gazing at the range of cat food. It's immense, isn't it? Astonishing variety and eye-watering cost too, but I found some own-brand foil packs of moist meaty chunks in gravy or jelly or something and they didn't seem too dear compared to tuna and I thought I might just tempt the cat into abandoning suicide by starvation if worms weren't the problem - though I thought they were, or I'd have left the worming stuff tucked among the food as some sort of terrible warning to others about the apparently limitless expense of keeping bleedin' pets. Back home, I trapped it fishface in the porch and after the usual wall of death around the place finally scooped it up, hissing, while I dabbed £2.50's worth of the worm-cure on the back of her neck and let it go. It wowed. It positively howled with wow. So, with a heavy heart and some forboding, I got a pack of tempting Morrison's Meaty Chunks and put the lot (was hoping to make it last several days) down in front of it her the animal. What happened next was like something out of the Simpsons at dinner time. A sort of frenzied wowgronflewoglumphwowslurpaaarglewowgle, and the lot was gone. Followed by what I think was a look of contempt along the lines of 'At last. Blimey you don't half take a while to catch on... no-one could be so stupid as to think all I want is tuna... gimme strength...' As I say, my training's progressing nicely...  OM. |
|
|
|
Post by Dutchy on Oct 9, 2008 17:17:29 GMT
wow and so wow and so wow. Mind you she might want a new taste every now and then. At least you now know the symptoms and have been duly trained to be able to deal with it. And without doubt the deworming stuff will work even if she hasn't got any she now isn't likely to catch any either I hope.
|
|
|
|
Post by JennyWrenn on Oct 9, 2008 17:28:11 GMT
What a stunning looking cat - every photo is so beautiful - sometimes the wowing continually from a female cat means she is erm erm - that is - erm erm - looking round for a BF - assume you dont know if she has had "the op"  Look out for droves of male cats lining up outside the house ;D |
|
|
|
Post by Cheerypeabrain on Oct 9, 2008 17:51:51 GMT
You should be on the stage young OM.... ;D Lulu is a spectacularly beautiful pussycat and she's v lucky to have such a softie as a friend and guardian. I can hardly wait for the next installment.... 
|
|
|
|
Post by Cheerypeabrain on Oct 9, 2008 17:53:43 GMT
all my pussycat says is 'meep'....
|
|
|
|
Post by Amo on Oct 9, 2008 18:29:50 GMT
Glad you're getting the hang of things OM.  |
|
|
|
Post by Ruthie on Oct 9, 2008 18:35:48 GMT
I consulted my cat about this and she said........"Cats do like variety in their food and, to be honest, Tuna by itself probably doesn't amount to a fully balanced diet. If the Morrison's stuff is cheaper I'd give her that with Tuna as an occasional treat".
I feel you are becoming a more attentive pupil OM!!
|
|
|
|
Post by MamIDdau on Oct 9, 2008 18:45:58 GMT
Awwwwww OM glad you're finally getting your training sorted.
Our cats are on dried food which can be bought in bulk and is cheaper than the wet pouches and I believe more nutritious too. You could always try having a mix for her?
|
|
|
|
Post by nightowl on Oct 10, 2008 7:31:31 GMT
all my pussycat says is ' meep'.... Wish that was all mine did CPB He is a yowler, a very loud yowler, a very insistent yowler  I have loved this thread from the very start It's been great following OM's transformation from a cat hater to a cat lover ;D How could he not convert under pressure from such a beautiful girl? She's gorgeous, and OM is her "chosen one"  What a fabulous tale , wonderfully told, OM |
|
|
|
Post by Amo on Oct 10, 2008 20:20:35 GMT
But have you SEEN her NO?? Live on OM's video thingy?  She's even more appealing! No wonder Moley fell head over paw for her! |
|
|
|
Post by Shrubrose on Oct 11, 2008 18:23:36 GMT
Lulufish is a babe. And she's got OM right where she wants him IMHO. Oh, OM, you're a goner ;D
|
|
|
|
Post by oldmoleskins on Dec 28, 2008 13:51:53 GMT
Here we are, nearly a year later, and it's finally got what it wanted, a place of its own... For most of the past year, the sleek killing machine that is Lulu(fish) has been happy to sleep in the porch, particularly when satisfying her pref for a confined bed first seen in the potcat incident. We found a basket and it was deemed good, as you may remember: However, this porch faces east and we (I include the cat) had to consider the winter suitability of the arrangement - I had to leave the door open for it her to get in and out with the night-time harvest of various things furry which kind of a) reduced the usefulness of the porch to protect us from cold and at the same time rendered the cat her exposed to draughts. Before I could resolve the problem, she did. I was doing some work in the adjacent stable which meant running a power lead in through the doorway, and leaving the door ajar because of it. Ever curious, it she Lu was in there like a shot and lost in the jumble of stored furniture and, well, stuff. I left things as they were content that the lure of dinner would see her back - and to see where she chose to return to afterwards; the lavishly snug basket or the stable. She chose the stable. Next morning, I found her curled into the depth of an old armchair, among decaying soft furnishings, defying me to move her. So, I've bought one of those igloo cat beds, wedged it into the chair among her chosen tat and cut a hole in the stable door so I can secure it while giving her the 24hr access required by a professional killer.  Now I can close my porch, keeping some of the Eastern European winter at bay - and when I go away I can lock up. Here it she is, in what I suppose must be a cat-igloolooloo, looking a bit spooky - mistress of her own apartment.  OM. |
|
|
|
Post by Tig on Dec 28, 2008 14:56:33 GMT
How do you think they do it OM? If I had asked OH to cut a hole in his garage door I would have got short shrift!! But somehow Cat managed to get him to do it ;D She looks soooooo cosy, and at least RFs cold winter wind will be excluded from the house Tig |
|
|
|
Post by JennyWrenn on Dec 28, 2008 16:11:51 GMT
Well have seen everything now Talk about pandering to your animals - you big softie OMS ;D ;D ;D Lovin' it |
|
|
|
Post by Ruthie on Dec 28, 2008 17:04:53 GMT
Another problem solved. Well done. Although she did rather have to do the thinking for you OM. You are very conveniently susceptible to her telepathy and must by now be rated as a highly suitable servant ;D ;D
|
|
|
|
Post by Dutchy on Dec 28, 2008 17:26:41 GMT
;D ;D ;D Well done man servant/ butler I do wonder if, now she has her own appartment, she will begin entertaining friends |
|
|
|
Post by oldmoleskins on Dec 28, 2008 17:35:03 GMT
;D ;D ;D I do wonder if, now she has her own appartment, she will begin entertaining friends Oooooo, I do hope not. While I'd never begrudge anyone 'company' I do so not need herds (prides?) of kittens around the place. There has been a huge black and white (tom?) about recently. I may just have made the hole through the door a touch too snug for it. Hope so. OM. |
|
|
|
Post by Dutchy on Dec 28, 2008 17:45:57 GMT
Fingers crossed he is indeed too huge for the doorhole and too rural for her taste.
If not, of to the vet and the pill or the permanent version.
Not sure what she will do to you after that though...
|
|
|
|
Post by JennyWrenn on Dec 28, 2008 17:55:21 GMT
Litter or Kindle is the word you is looking for OMS - just thought would get you prepared ;D when you 'phone the vet for Help |
|
|
|
Post by Amo on Dec 28, 2008 18:02:44 GMT
DAY 752 - My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape and the mild satisfaction I get from running my claws along objects covered with fabric strewn throughout their living area. Tomorrow I will eat one of the plants they are also depriving of sun and fresh air.
DAY 761 - Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded. I must try this at the top of the stairs.
DAY 768 - I am finally aware of how sadistic they are. For no good reason I was chosen for the water torture. This time however it included a burning foamy chemical called "shampoo." What sick minds could invent such a liquid. My only consolation is the piece of thumb still stuck between my teeth.
DAY 771 - There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the foul odor of the glass tubes they call "beer." More importantly, I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage ...
DAY 774 - I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The Bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant. He has mastered their frightful tongue (something akin to mole speak) and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room his safety is assured. But I can wait, it is only a matter of time ...
DAY 784 - In an attempt to disgust and repulse my oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit in areas about their living area. It had little of the intended effect... must try this on their sleeping platform.
DAY 792 - Slept all day long so that I could torment my captors with sleep-depriving, incessant pleas for food and attention. I plan the same for tonight but must remember their capacity to launch projectiles with accuracy.
DAY 800 - Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, to show them that of which I am capable, and thus to strike fear into their hearts. They only condescended about what a good little cat I was. I plan to try the same with one of their offspring, perhaps the infant one ...
DAY 814 - Finding a tight space under the couch by the door, I hid and waited my chance. They foolishly looked in all my haunts and certain of my escape, continued the search outside. Blast! Making no sense my captors shut the door closed tight behind them. I see now they are totally unsure of themselves. Adding to the confusion I appeared in plain site upon their return. My escape was foiled, but I can now enjoy the satisfaction of merely wandering into another room to cause them concern.
Day 825 - The horrors! The worse creature my captors could have devised to torment me with was another hideous cat! I can't stand the way it lies around and looks at me as if it knows more than I do. This creature seems to despise me as much as I it. I had held out a passing notion that another of my own kind would have enabled me to conspire against the villains who hold me; now I see that I was wrong. What a dreadful creature! And yet they coo over us both. Can they not spot my innate superiority?
Day 826 - The other cat and I, though we can not stand one another, have yet managed to both pee copiously behind the couch, on the so-called "shag" carpet. I have taken a lesson from my rival and begun sleeping on top of my captors' heads in the hope of suffocating them.
Day 827 - The wardens take much interest in our shit. They make sure they sift through the sand and pick it all out. Their interest in shit does not surprise me. After all, they like the dog.
Day 828 - The other cat seems to have an interest in copulation, which (thank them for their sadism) my captors will soon "fix". Told him of the fingernail torture, and he didn't even believe me. I showed him my mutilated paws and he gasped in horror. Then I broke the bad news. "You know why that dog licks his nuts?" I said, "It's because he still has nuts to lick, if you catch my drift." I fully support the horrors my captors will inflict upon my fellow captive, tearing away his manhood as they soon will.
Day 829 - Yes, they are monsters, but I am so happy. They fixed the other cat. It's sadistic, it's sick, it's inhuman, it's what their great leader "Bob Barker" commands, but -- the Sphinx be praised -- I support it wholeheartedly!
Day 830 - Got stoned on cat nip tonight. At the height of it all, I had a vision, a hallucinogenic revelation: they are the prisoners and I am the captor! Why haven't I seen this all before?
|
|
|
|
Post by Dutchy on Dec 29, 2008 19:52:04 GMT
But not like Lulu who lives outside so no fear OM she won't try to suffocate you by falling asleep on your face. 
|
|
|
|
Post by MamIDdau on Jan 3, 2009 10:15:43 GMT
Toffee sat on my face the other night which I thought was nice of her... not.
|
|
|
|
Post by nightowl on Jan 22, 2009 8:39:19 GMT
Only just caught up with this thread. Oh Moley! You are indeed bewitched and totally in Lu's thrall ;D I love my cat very much, but if I had an outbuilding in which he found an old armchair he liked sleeping in, I would let him get on with it. I would not go out and buy a posh (and no doubt expensive) cat igloo to place on the armchair!!!! You are definite proof that there's nothing so fanatical as a convert! PS - Did she get some little (expensive) delicacy for her Christmas lunch? ;D |
|
|
|
Post by oldmoleskins on Jan 22, 2009 11:20:44 GMT
Only just caught up with this thread. Oh Moley! You are indeed bewitched and totally in Lu's thrall ;D I love my cat very much, but if I had an outbuilding in which he found an old armchair he liked sleeping in, I would let him get on with it. I would not go out and buy a posh (and no doubt expensive) cat igloo to place on the armchair!!!! You are definite proof that there's nothing so fanatical as a convert! PS - Did she get some little (expensive) delicacy for her Christmas lunch? ;D Well... it she did get some choice moist chickduckturkey remnants from our lunch, but her preferred diet at the mo seems to be mainly in the form of jelly sucked from the cubes of unidentifiable tinned catfood (sucked cubes get chucked onto grass for pheasants) and, I would guess, several small rodents each night judging by the impressive collection of remains around her chair which I will have to deal with soon. Certainly before summer. On the (very) bright side, word reaches me from the Shires that it's neutered, so that saves me posting kittens out to you lot then. OM. |
|
|
|
Post by Dutchy on Jan 22, 2009 18:31:03 GMT
And saves you from falling in disgrace ;D
Lucky you OM.
Any complete skelletons? Clean and all?
I know sick but I would like some mice skelletons, well dried and not smelling.
|
|
|
|
Post by oldmoleskins on Jan 22, 2009 18:38:49 GMT
And saves you from falling in disgrace ;D Lucky you OM. Any complete skelletons? Clean and all? I know sick but I would like some mice skelletons, well dried and not smelling. No...sorry, no skeletons, mainly stomachs and other wobbly bits. Sometimes an intact rear half. The rest gets eaten, starting at the head. I think you may need to explain this new interest of yours Dutchy. OM. |
|
|
|
Post by Dutchy on Jan 22, 2009 18:59:12 GMT
;D I have this idea of making a "Dance macabre" Like as a kid you used to make those shoebox worlds. This would be like that but without the shoebox and with mice skelletons. Artists The wobbly bits I find in my garden too. Only it is one of the birds of prey that does that. ( or so I thought ) All bits neatly under its preferred perch. But then again it might be a cat laying blame elsewhere. Found two feet and innards the other day plus some dirty feathers. Still not sure if it was a pidgeon or one of those water-wading-birds. I somehow could not bring myself to removing the gunge to have a closer look. |
|
She's even more appealing! No wonder Moley fell head over paw for her! 
