Do children have too much?

[owainglyndwr]

My wife and I were discussing that time of the year that creeps around quicker every year ... yep Christmas.

We are at a total loss what to get our children.
My 11yr old son's bedroom is like Currys. Xbox, PS2, TV, VCR and a stereo better than mine. My 8yr old daughter has got a TV, DVD player, stereo and PS1.
They had new bikes last year which will last another 12months

I don't consider my kids to be 'spoilt' and compared to a lot of their friends who have got the latest 'everything' they're very good when NO is said to them ... but do we spoil our kids by trying to make up for giving them things we never had

Even after writing all that ... still none the wiser for presents this year

[sleepysunday]

I suppose 2 satsumas and a tank made from a cotton reel, a match, and a slice of candle is not going to be enough then?

[piggingardener]

sleepysunday said:

I suppose 2 satsumas and a tank made from a cotton reel, a match, and a slice of candle is not going to be enough then?

Wot - no nuts???

[sleepysunday]

Wot - no nuts???

And spoil them? Nah!

[sweetleaf]

owainglyndwr said:

Even after writing all that ... still none the wiser for presents this year

Tell me about it! .......and it only gets worse as they get older,( thing is we only give them most of this stuff because we really dont think its safe to let them do what we did as kids, and we try to tie them to the house so we know where they are)
The more we give them, though, the more they expect next time.

[Plocket]

It depends on how you look at it! Yes children these days get a lot more than we had as kids, but that's partly because there's so much more available now, and like you I try and give LP things that I would have wanted when I was her age.

How about sitting your kids down with a Woolworths catalogue or Argos catalogue and ask them to cut out pictures and details of all the things they like. That might give you a few pointers to start off with!!!!! Another good place to look is "iwantoneofthose.com" - some of the ideas are out there but it might spawn other thoughts.

And if their bedrooms really are crammed you could also suggest that they give away anything they don't use to charity or sell stuff on e-bay for pocketmoney (or Daddy's beer money!!!!!!!!!)

[4pygmies]

I'm afraid I'm as mean as a mean thing with my kids. The oldest two are adults now and I ask them what they would like and tell them my budget - they're trained very well and don't exceed it! The youngest is 6 and still quite good about presents. She doesn't expect huge amounts spent on her and I've brainwashed her from the start about consumerism and greed!
She already knows that she won't get a TV in her room till she's 34, so was thrilled with her new stereo last year. Her birthday is Jan 3rd so she gets her best present then - last year a proper bike (ie no glittery bits, no Barbies and not pink). She wouldn't get on it for 3 months as it had no stabilisers but now loves it. I rarely buy her new toys as we do creative stuff instead but she's still managed to get a room full of cr*p. I have no idea what she's getting this year yet....
I do think kids are pretty spoilt really these days. The technology changes so rapidly that their stuff is out of date after 13 minutes. Fortunately in Norfolk we are still in the dark ages so our kids don't know about a lot of the stuff sophisticated towny kids have! I have no idea what some of the stuff WB's kids have IS (PS2? XBox?) and nor has my daughter.......

[MamIDdau]

My boyf's nephews/niece are quite spoilt they have a lot of new gadgets and stuff. I'd consider myself to be a bit spoilt when I was a kid but by the time I was growing up, my siblings had left home and my parents had got better jobs with more money so had more disposable income. I asked for stuff but I didn't throw hissy fits if I didn't get them. I was always just grateful to get something! I still am. I give people a list so they don't have to think or worry if they want to get me something but it isn't a demands list and if I don't get everything on there I don't complain.

I once sat there with the argos catalogue lookin thru stuff and folding pages over on stuff I'd prolly get in the long run and when xmas came around I realised my mum had looked thru at what I'd folded over and bought me half the stuff! Crafty woman lol

[JennyWrenn]

I work with children and in my office I bought lots of new comics, books and some interesting toys including fluffy dogs, bunnies, etc etc, to keep them amused

I piled up, in the corner, a lot of old cardboard to throw onto the office tip

Ys you've guessed it - they played with the cardboard

[anneliesje]

My children have none of these things in their room! If they want something the have to work for it!
Of course they are older, 19, 17 and 14.
Eldest daughter worked as a student in summer and with her money she bought a TV-DVD set for her student room in leuven. She has a laptop because you need this as a student.
G-son has worked 6 weeks during summer and bought a computer with this. Ph-Monster can't work, but she gets what she needs. One birthday the whole family put money together to buy her a stereo.
They know I'm working like a fool and they know money can't be spent just like this.
They all have a bike (well not the eldest one, she had an old bike which was stolen a few months ago). They received it at 12 and it has to last till....
When they were smaller and had to change bikes quicker they were often passed on.
For Christmas the maximum amount of money I ever spent on them was 69€/child. No playstation in this house, I hate the thing, and we have only one TV.
They don't miss on computers, because there is a computer in the house which they can all use.
They like to read books, and tomorrow we will go to the book fair where they can spend 25€ each. We all write down titles of books which we would like to read, to get them in the librairie or to have as a present under the christmas tree.
I'm sorry to be a bore, but I don't think they are more happy when they have all these things.
I have no idea what they will get this year, but they know the budget when they put together their wishlist.
When they were smaller they asked for games as e.g. cluedo, or a video of their favorite cartoon or a cd,...
I also put some money on their saving account with Christmas; And of course they can ask for money under the tree too. I then buy them a funny present in which I hide the money. With the money which they also get from grandmother or godmother, they can buy a bigger thing if they want that. No problem for me.
I hope I have not offended anyone.
Take care
Anneliesje

sorry I couldn't give you any suggestion for your list Welshblue. Mine make a list and I also keep my eyes/ears open

[Chuckles]

Anneliesje, sounds to me like you have it spot on, you are teaching your kids the value of money and also to appreciate things. Well done.

[owainglyndwr]

Thx all for your ideas/views

Thankfully my kids do value things for what they are not what they cost.
I was proud of my lil' gal last week; listening to her talk to a friend who's also 8 but who has got a mobile phone, a pc of her own and the latest technology in everything.
This little girl was telling my daughter what she wanted for Christmas (an obscene list) and my lil' gal said to her, "Christmas is about more than presents, Sara ... "

Mine too are just as happy to sit down and play board games; my son can beat me at chess, but it's nice to treat them once a year when most of their friends get gifts 'on tap'.
As for hobbies: my son has just been selected to play football for his county and scouts from an academy are interested in him. My daughter has won 2 Welsh National Eisteddod categories for art so it's not as if they're sat in front of the TV all day every day.
They also donate 2 weeks pocket money to Operation Christmas Child every year
www.samaritanspurse.org/OCC.asp?MPGID=1

I guess I'll have to go with SleepySunday's

I suppose 2 satsumas and a tank made from a cotton reel, a match, and a slice of candle is not going to be enough then?

Although he missed out the elastic band.

[Deleted]

Hi WB!

It's that time of year isn't it? I spent 6 hours in the car today and did some thinking <notsurewheretheother5hrs58minuteswentsmiley> What do I remember from childhood that was good over the festive season? Yes I remember the Old Man doing the train set, the scalextrics and the bike, even the £10 Binatone "TV" tennis game....ping......ping

...but the main memory is that me Dad had rare time off, some of which he spent with me. That sort of stuff is precious....so why not promise them a "really wicked" treat with their Dad at some firmly fixed point in the diary? Naturally they'll get a shed load of other stuff....but it'll make you feel better!

Personally, I reckon my lot have everything they need, so satumas and nuts for them and half a crown if they're lucky! Did I mention I'm from Yorkshire..........

[Deleted]

I know just what you mean CC. When I was a kid my parents didn't have a car or much money, but there are 'events' I remember far better than material things. They gave me time, attention and love which is far more important than things money can buy.

I always remember Summer holidays when Mum would come in and wake us up really early, and tell us to get dresses because we were going out for the day. 'Where' we would ask and he reply would be ' Don't know, lets see where the first train is going to' . We could end up anywhere - London Zoo, One of the London Museums, Battersea FunFair - Skegness, Yarmouth, Mablethope. She would have made sandwiches and packed some fruit and a bottle of pop and ice cream could be bought there.

I wouldn;t have swapped that for all the Nintendos, Tellys etc in the world.

Too many kids today know the price of eveything and the value of nothing.

[Jonah]

But you know what, I think a lot of the children get it from their parents. It's not just the children that seem to have 'too much' these days IMO. Things that we used to put on a list for big christmas pressies [new boots, clothes, tv's, small gadgets etc] seem to be bought as the need arises, it's far too easy what with all the plastic being thrown at you from these financial companies if pennies are short.
I suppose we could say that there are ways of getting pretty much anything these days [within reason] and it often seems harder to actually resist temptation and wait for birthdays and christmas. I try to be strong....... ;D

[Deleted]

My children have most things and I have given them a woolies catalogue to browse and circle what they want - my Son hardly circled anything and my Daughter circled more than half the book My children are completely different to one another so I think a lot of it is nature rather than nuture, If I ask him wants he wants his typical response is - oh it doesn't matter Mummy, suprise me! Whereas she will reel off a huge list.

As someone mentioned (can't remember who) I try not to spend too much money but I will try to spend as much time with them as possible over the Christmas period playing with them and their board games, my Son certainly values that more. I work full time, long hours with a lot of overseas trips so my time with them is very precious.

[Auricula]

In answer to the thread title - No
The older one gets the more selective ones memory becomes!!