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Post by sweetleaf on Nov 1, 2006 13:26:17 GMT
leaves swelled and peeled away, stalk lengthened and became thinner finally revealing........
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Post by Deleted on Nov 1, 2006 14:04:31 GMT
... a small, rather scared looking radish, narrow at the top, widening to silky roots at the base, flushed in a delicate pink. Using its roots, which slithered like snakes - but rather attractive, unthreatening snakes - it moved slowly to Loinel Postlethwaite, who stood transfixed. Although no mouth, or indeed any speaking apparatus, was visible a voice emanted from the small, pink radish. A pleasing voice, gentle and rather sad. "I am the radish of days gone by. You were indeed a geography teacher, for your cover is but a cover from the past. And - as Brussels Sprout here has shown us - we must peel away the layers and leaves of deception to reach the truth. You tried to drum the rivers of France into your students with the thin end of a ruler. Your voice grated on their delicate ears. And those children, grown now, have sent me to .....
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Post by piggingardener on Nov 1, 2006 14:16:05 GMT
..........get their own back. You see, I am no ordinary radish, I have super powers and so am able to wreak havoc if I so desire. The children have instructed me in what I must make you do in recompense for all those dreadful lessons, and now you must..............
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Post by Plocket on Nov 1, 2006 14:32:56 GMT
Eat me and then you will realise what havoc I can wreak!!!
The little raddish forced himself into the resisting mouth Lionel Postlethwaite.........
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Post by Deleted on Nov 1, 2006 14:39:10 GMT
... who gurgled and gagged, his face purpling, hands clenching and unclenching. His eyes bulged, his mouth opened - and suddenly he retched, spitting forth rulers in all shapes and sizes. Plastic rulers and wooden ones, metric rulers and imperial ones. As the rulers, those symbols of childhood torture, hopped and slid across the floor, Postlethwaite gave one gigantic burp and out of his mouth flew a yardstick - a vicious instrument with serrated edges, aimed straight at ....
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Post by Plocket on Nov 1, 2006 14:46:42 GMT
the greenhouse!
But worse still was the build up of gas in Poor Postlethwaite's stomach. Relieved that the rulers were now no longer inside, his gastric juices started working on emiting the gas.....
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Post by sweetleaf on Nov 1, 2006 15:13:25 GMT
....the corrosive gas began to dissolve Postlethwaite, as welshblue looked on and the Pumpkin King backed off , aghast at the vengeful destruction that Earths children had wrought on this pitiful bully, the King realised that this was all getting out of hand....
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Post by piggingardener on Nov 1, 2006 15:14:44 GMT
..........his stomach rumbled and gurgled, he went green in the face, and finally, a huge cloud of purple gas erupted from his velvet burgundy trousers. Just at that very moment, a young man on his way home from the pub, stopped to light a cigarette.....
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Post by piggingardener on Nov 1, 2006 15:15:43 GMT
Whoops - crossed storylines there Sweetleaf.......
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Post by sweetleaf on Nov 1, 2006 15:25:07 GMT
As he dissolved and gave off the corrosive explosive gas, (thanksPG) the fumes reached the lit cigarrette, flames rushed towards Postlethwaite and on the way.......
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Post by piggingardener on Nov 1, 2006 15:45:26 GMT
.....caught the Pumpkin King in their path. As his skin started to blacken and sizzle.............
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Post by sweetleaf on Nov 1, 2006 16:13:39 GMT
a delicious scent, reminiscent of roast dinners wafted across the garden, welshblue found his mouth watering,and just then, Postlethwaites gases exploded leaving nothing but a dazzling display of fireworks to mark his passing..........
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Post by piggingardener on Nov 1, 2006 16:35:52 GMT
Meanwhile, Welshblue and the young man with the cigarette wandered over to where the Pumpkin King had been, to their horror, they discovered...............
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Post by 4pygmies on Nov 1, 2006 16:38:03 GMT
the blackened remains of Sooty and Sue and a cello. "Oh No!" cried Welsh Blue, "But I thought they'd gone to the town hall to..."
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Post by piggingardener on Nov 1, 2006 16:47:02 GMT
...........entertain the troops. "What will Sweep do now all on his own and they've no musical accompaniment either" cried Welshblue, "who will save the day"........
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Post by sleepysunday on Nov 1, 2006 16:51:25 GMT
At that moment the musical sound of "Flash... ahhh ahhh" filled the air. There was a momentary blinding light and...
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Post by piggingardener on Nov 1, 2006 16:55:36 GMT
.......... a voice cried "Don't worry, I will save the day, but first I must go and save an entire planet"...........
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Post by mickthecactus on Nov 1, 2006 16:56:26 GMT
A beautiful young man holding a a packet of cleaning powder entered.......
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Post by sleepysunday on Nov 1, 2006 16:59:05 GMT
"Oh Flash, you're so brave", whimpered a blonde bimbo being held upright by an elderly professor type in the gathering crowd.
"Do be careful, won't you"
Flash blew her a kiss, and gave her one of his broad, cheesy smiles before...
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Post by mickthecactus on Nov 1, 2006 17:05:02 GMT
washing the paintwork down with his.........
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Post by Plocket on Nov 1, 2006 18:30:33 GMT
flowing golden locks of hair. In the distance there was an explosion. Flash turned suddenly, the light from a nearby streetlight illuminating his yellow grin.
"Get down Kale" he yelled pulling the bimbo to the ground and shoving the elderly professor to one side.
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Post by 4pygmies on Nov 1, 2006 18:36:20 GMT
They fell in a tangle and Flash felt a hand on his manly thigh...he turned just as the elderly professor removed his hand with a guilty start. As Flash leapt to his feet a unearthly scream hovered in the air and a small glove puppet appeared, its face distorted with grief......."SWEEP!!" Flash shouted "Don't......
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Post by 4pygmies on Nov 1, 2006 19:39:30 GMT
PLEASE someone save Sweep - I've murdered Sooty and Sue - OMG, the guilt.......
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Post by 4pygmies on Nov 1, 2006 21:24:22 GMT
No? Poor old Sweep, no one ever cared about him did they? Hello??? Hello?  |
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Post by piggingardener on Nov 2, 2006 16:37:42 GMT
Over to you C3D - well you did start it!!    |
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Post by Plocket on Nov 2, 2006 17:16:36 GMT
Sweep held his breath desperately wanting the experience to continue, but suddenly Thing appeared and shoved himself somewhere he shouldn't.....
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Post by Deleted on Nov 2, 2006 17:20:47 GMT
..when with a cough Sweep regurgitated a lump of the ancient bratwurst he had found earlier. Feeling much better he bounded around the garden, ears flying. Suddenly he stopped in mid leap and, with a low threatening squeak, he hissed at the apparition in front of him. They all gasped in horror, it was ...
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Post by Deleted on Nov 2, 2006 17:22:28 GMT
Oh, sorry, Plocket, you got there before me! Though now I look at it it might just follow on. Hmm.
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Post by sleepysunday on Nov 2, 2006 17:24:30 GMT
"Oh my!" exclaimed Sweep, as the warmth of Thing's deep penetration swept through his small fragile body. "oh!... oh!... oh!..." cried Sweep.
Suddenly, is if by magic Harry Corbett appeared, and bellowed "Izzy Wizzy Lets Get Busy"
"What do you think I am doing", gasped Sweep as Thing...
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Post by Plocket on Nov 2, 2006 17:24:44 GMT
PML Thelemon - I think we should carry on from yours!
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